Misery – By Slave Taquin

The real test of my control over my slaves comes during my absence.  It is in these times that the Slave becomes all too aware of its need for me in its life.  In our vanilla lives and relationships, we may face challenges and situations that give us cause to question the paths we are on. Though in our Vanilla lives, we often find ourselves on that path or in that situation for quite some time before the point is brought into question.  With a D/s relationship, the dynamics are very different.  A submissive has great needs indeed and an even temporary separation from its dominant, can cause the submissive to re-evaluate its position.  Submissive’s are generally needy in this respect.  I know, I am a former submissive and I know better than anyone how desperate that need for attention and stimulation can become; especially when it is delivered so expertly.  It is my duty as a Dominant to educate my subs by whatever means necessary, that whilst their needs are important they are still the submissive. They have agreed to hand over the control to me and to trust that I will act in their best interests even if they don’t feel as if I am doing so at the time; they will ultimately realise that I know what is best for them.  The submissive must also learn that in the grand scheme of things, a short absence isn’t going to hurt not in a long term commitment. It must be expected and anticipated. If I chose to, I will enforce a period of no contact as punishment and the submissive will accept this or face dismissal; and it should be known that I have dismissed unruly or uncontrollable slaves in the past.  Once dismissed, there is no way back.  With this in mind, Submissives in long term D/s Relationships must graciously accept the times of temporary separation that are completely out of anyone’s control.

This week’s diary from Slave Taquin, in my opinion,  portrays just how difficult that can be for a Submissive.  Remember Slaves, you must keep things in perspective.  In a long term D/s commitment, you have already crossed the line between fantasy and reality and there are going to be times when our vanilla lives cross with our second lives.

Sleepless Nights…

At the beginning of this week it is 3 weeks since my last visit to the HOD, and my last orgasm. Mistresses property has not had the pleasure of her touch for over 8 weeks now (she refused to take the cage off on my last visit, making me cum whilst still wearing the device). Inevitably things have become really difficult.

Night-time is the worst. Sunday night was typical of what it is like currently. I went to bed and deliberately focused my thoughts on vanilla life. It seemed to work and I began to doze off, but just before I dropped off to sleep I must have let my guard down for a moment, and Mistress crept into my thoughts. Before I could evict her from my brain again I found myself fantasising about my next visit to the HOD and what it would be like to feel the wonderful gentle touch of Mistresses hands. There is only one outcome once this happens. Everything down below starts straining to free itself from its stainless steel prison. Amongst other things the ring behind my balls, that prevents the cage coming off, is pulled up and away from my body and starts to crush my balls. Any soreness that I had been experiencing during the day is made worse. All in all it is a most unpleasant experience. It is of course a vicious circle. I think about my discomfort, I think about the lock on my device for which Mistress holds the key, I think about the fact that she wont let me out of the device unless she has me tied up at the HOD, I think about her touch, I don’t sleep!

My morning text on the Monday mentioned that I had had a sleepless night. Mistress asked why. I briefly explained, to which she taunted me with the line that my session next week ‘must seem like an eternity away’. I had told her that the night times were particularly difficult currently but that I was coping ok during the day. The inevitable response was for Mistress to send me a picture of her, frankly gorgeous, backside with some suitable comments attached. Mistress knows that face sitting is one of the many new experiences that she has subjected me to that I have discovered that I like.

On Tuesday Mistress told me that she was feeling really unwell. I hate it when this happens. I find that I worry about her. Feeling ill is no fun. Frankly I don’t want Mistress to think of me when she has her own challenges to deal with. Last time this happened I took a step back on the basis that I didn’t want to bother her. Mistress punished me severely for this. I discovered that taking a decision of this type by myself is not allowed. This week I did not repeat the same mistake. Instead I have contacted Mistress every day in order that she knows how I am faring, as well as to try to offer her a little support from afar.

Mistress did set me a task to complete whilst she was below par. The task was to write a story titled ‘Nightmare in the Park’. The basic idea for the story had come to Mistress in a dream apparently (it sounded more like a nightmare to me). The end result was yours truly being tied to a tree and abandoned in the middle of a public park. My past experience of having been set writing tasks for Mistress is that the end result is that I make myself unbearably horny as I develop a fantasy story line. This was not to be the case with this one however. I did enjoy writing the story, and I hope that Mistress gets some pleasure from reading it, but the premise is so far outside of my comfort zone that it didn’t have the normal effect.

For the first time this week I have really fallen out of love with the chastity device. I have been wearing it now 24/7 since the end of July. Every night I have been woken by its unflinching ability to squeeze the life out of any potential erection. Each day it has constantly reminded me of its presence. When Mistress is unwell I end up wondering why I have allowed myself to be enslaved in this manner.

Today I am happy again. It sounds like Mistress is on the mend. Her morning text tells me that she is feeling better and her return to Twitter suggests that life might return to normal once more. I know that it is only a few days to my next session with her. How I look forward to that after 4 long weeks….

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