You will see from this write up that my dear little bumbling Slave, Sissy Mouse suffered a blip but he’s out the other side of that now as you will have read from other posts. This one is a bit late as I am still catching up here… you Slaves keep me very busy!
Distance control journal week’s 14 and 15
Chastity fail, exercise fail and poor mental health.
My journal once again has a different theme to it due to the above.
Week 14 of distance control starts off well with the anticipation of spending a full week in chastity with the keys locked away in the safe. Monday comes and with the click of the padlock I send Mistress my morning message. Mistress replies with “I bet that click felt good didn’t it?” which of course it does to be locked up for Mistress. Mistress also informs me that any issues with my device I am to report them immediately. I thank Mistress and carry on with my day. I know Mistress is busy with her vanilla life so don’t expect to hear much from her this week.
Tuesday arrives with very little sleep due to chastity and my constant whirring mind. I awake to a message from Mistress enquiring how her locked cock is. I reply that it’s locked and happy. When I finish work I go for a run and enjoy the slight clinking of the padlock as I run.
Wednesday and I awake from quite a decent sleep but I’m feeling very sore and take a look and the device in just 2 days has given me a nasty sore bit on the underside of my cock. I message Mistress and without hesitation she messages back the code. I remove the device with great sadness but this would never heal otherwise. I spend the rest of the day feeling quite down about another fail and I think its time to accept it’s not for me however much I want it to be. Mistress messages me later in the day to check on me and to remind me to not let it get me down. But try as I might it still does so I plan to go for a run after work but that doesn’t work either as I only get to the end of the road and give up.
Thursday and I awake from another poor nights sleep. The chastity fail and other things in my life have led me to think that maybe a D/s relationship is no longer for me. However during the day things get a bit better and the black cloud lifts a bit. I message Mistress to let her know about my stupid thoughts to which she replies “I won’t let you give up and even IF I did you would come crawling back. Remember you are truly fucked” Which is of course true our D/s relationship is a big part of my life and I enjoy it very much. Once I finish work I go for a run this time trying a new schedule that Mistress has recommended which is run 2 minutes then walk 2 minutes for a total of 24 minutes. So I am just starting my 3rd batch of running when I fall over and it’s so unexpected that I almost fall flat on my face which luckily I didn’t but I did hurt my shoulder and knee. I pick myself up and hobble home get inside and just burst into tears. It’s at this point that I know something nasty is coming.
On Friday I awake after another poor nights sleep and message Mistress to wish her a nice weekend and to let her know I’ve managed to be a bumbling fool and fallen over. I then spend the next few hours in bed frankly not being arsed to get up. I finally get up and mope about the house; luckily I didn’t have any pressing work on that day.
Saturday comes and I feel no better this is probably the darkest cloud I have had over me for many years. I don’t message Mistress today because she is away and I never want to be a pain however later in the day I unexpectedly receive a message from Mistress asking how I am. I just reply that I am sore and I hoped she was having a nice time away.
Sunday proves a little better to begin with but soon returns to dark clouds and I decide to go to bed early and try and catch up on so much missed sleep. I manage to get some decent sleep and miss a message from Mistress informing me she is back and is looking forward to getting back to work.
I awake on Monday and read my message from Mistress and think it only courteous to inform her of my general feeling of doom and that I would like to request a break from the distance control and to postpone our session at the end of the week as I don’t want to mess her around cancelling at the last minute while I try and sort my head out. Mistress replies that she is sorry to hear about this and of course I can take all the time I need.
Since Saturday I have reverted to bloke mode no frilly panties no exercise and just eating crap to try and make myself feel better. Mistress messages me on Tuesday evening asking how I am and telling me that our session is still open as it will probably make me feel better (once again Mistress knows me better than I know myself because I was convinced at that point that it would not be the case).
Wednesday arrives with me feeling a bit happier and also I’ve got some decent sleep and my day goes well.
Thursday comes and I wake up feeling like a different person, the black clouds have gone and everything feels great. I message Mistress to ask if the offer of our session is still available to which she replies that she knew I would be ready for it. However come Friday it turns out the timing for our session wont work so it gets postponed until the following Friday.
The final day of week 15 Saturday is met by my message to Mistress being returned with instructions to tie my cock and balls with a stocking and edge 3 times during the day and get back into my frilly panties. I thank Mistress and duly do as instructed. Normality returns!!
I hope the above doesn’t come over as woe is me because that is not my intention. I hope it demonstrates that even when your life goes a bit lopsided an established D/s relationship can help you back on the straight and narrow.
I cannot thank Mistress enough, even with everything that was going on in her life she still had took time to ask how I was which helped me a great deal.
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