Getting it wrong, for most of the week.
I thought I would write this brief catch up because as with all our blogs it gives Mistress an insight into what’s going on in our submissive minds.
Since my last wonderful visit to Mistress, I have been floating on a wave of submissive joy. Mistress has allowed me Twitter access for the last 2 weeks. Although being Mistress she didn’t tell me, I found out in an email from Slave Taquin about a week later. So, I have been enjoying my Twitter access and as it turns out other adult content on my phone and have been catching up with all the blogs on Mistress’s website. Everything has been going swimmingly until I went away for a couple of days last week and as always turn everything off in my man cave/office.
On my return, I stupidly decided to leave Mistress’s spy camera switched off. There was a genuine reason for this but I foolishly didn’t ask Mistress’s permission to do it. On Sunday (so now 2 days with the camera off) Mistress sends me a message telling me what I already knew that the camera was off. I switched it on about an hour later and informed Mistress why it had been off but this was after the event and not before. A tweet by Mistress made it abundantly clear this was unacceptable.
The following day I sent Mistress my usual morning message apologising for the camera incident and Mistress was (as always) very understanding on the reasons why and was happy to let it pass this time. This is where something came over me. I don’t know if it was my wonderful feeling of submission or just plain stupidity but my reply was that I didn’t think she should let it pass. Now one thing I have learned (although not on this particular day) is never question Mistress or her decisions. I knew that Mistress had a busy day so didn’t expect a reply but what did dawn on me during the day was that it was a stupid thing to do. Later that day Mistress messaged me and said that she had considered my message during her busy day. I won’t go into the ins and outs but let’s just say the I should have just thanked Mistress for her leniency and not tell her what I should and shouldn’t be allowed to get away with. I have a punishment coming, what that is I have no idea but whatever it is it is duly deserved.
I, as one of Mistress’s longest-serving pets, should know better. I should have asked permission in the first place and kept my mouth shut when I was granted leniency. Lesson learned.
I contacted Slave Taquin because he had been doing a DIY job for Mistress on Tuesday (I’m sure you will read about it in his blog) and asked him if Mistress was spitting feathers over the incident. Luckily, she hadn’t although Mistress did point out to him that a punishment would be forthcoming and he also felt that it would be appropriate. He was also kind enough to send me the following bullet points from past email conversations between us….
Do I wish Mistress was less understanding? Sometimes yes, her tweet certainly made me gulp even though I knew it was ok. (This was regarding the camera being turned off)
I do sometimes wish for a situation that I am pleading with all my heart and still get a cursory and dismissive ‘No’ from Mistress!
Blackmail really turns me on so I fully understand your mixed feelings about being in deep poo!
I do crave the harshness and fear and then have a wobble about it!!
I was very amused that Taquin also kindly said he would happily tweet them just in case Mistress may have missed them as she has access to both our respective email accounts. We also discussed the fact that whilst are interests at the HOD are at different ends of the fetish spectrum, our distance control interests, however, are very similar.
My messages from Mistress for the rest of the Tuesday were slightly lighter but I know she won’t forget about this.
On Wednesday, I didn’t sleep very well and awoke late and gingerly messaged Mistress to wish her a nice day. Mistress breezily replied to my message saying that she was enjoying a relaxed working day after very busy few days. Mistress was in-fact in a very good mood and was overjoyed by the DIY job Taquin had done for her the day previously. I also thanked Mistress for the set of tweets she had posted the night before thanking her pets for doing so much for her. I am honoured to be one of Mistress’s pets and truly adore her and will do anything within my abilities to help her out.
Later in the day around lunchtime, I am sitting on the sofa when I hear a voice which makes me think I am starting to imagine things. Luckily, I don’t have voices in my head, oh no much worse than that. I discover that Mistress can talk to me through the security camera. It was a joy to chat with a very cheery Mistress albeit with satellite delay and once again caught me completely off guard. Mistress ended by saying she would be installing Grammarly on my pc later to ensure my future blogs would be error free. I am always grateful that Mistress spends her valuable time adding (or removing) things from my pc and phone to help her control me and in return make me feel more controlled, horny and submissive to her.
Around an hour later I was on my pc when suddenly Mistress bursts in. We have a nice chat via notepad and then Mistress starts doing what she needs to do. Unusually Mistress allows me to watch her in action albeit with the mouse and keyboard locked. Unfortunately, Grammarly turns out to be a no go. Mistress informs me she will continue to check it her end and all errors will be noted. The conversation then turns to reinstalling Qustodio. Mistress installed this back in January when I wasn’t in a very submissive state. This time I was very keen for Mistress to install it. This is because by having Qustodio installed it takes less time for Mistress (who only has to sign into one account) to allow or deny her pets various accesses at her particular whim. If I had Qustodio installed on my pc I would have had fetish access for the last 2 weeks. Because Windows family was my parental control I didn’t have any because it’s extra faf for Mistress. By having Qustodio I was also allowed the Firefox browser back. So far apart from the almost immediate removal of adult access, everything is working well.
On Thursday, I message Mistress to wish her a nice day. Mistress informs me she has a very long busy day. This turns out to be not too busy to remove all my adult internet access. At least I still have the joy of Twitter. I thank Mistress for my brief pc access and expect to hear nothing more from her today. Very kindly later in the day Mistress sent me a lovely picture of herself in a very fetching leather bra and trousers. This led me to reply that it was very lovely of her to share such a picture although it was not helping my current tease-able submissive state. I felt horny as hell for the rest of the day added to by Mistress then sending me a gif of her fondling her leather bra encased Deelights.
It reminded me of another conversation that I had with Slave Taquin about our HOD interests. He hates pain where I really enjoy it, nothing turns me on more than being in severe pain and agony. However, I have a great admiration that he can endure a session of being teased by Mistress and her fabulous womanly gifts. I try my hardest to see Mistress as a giver of pain and punishment and not focus too much on how very hot, sexy and attractive she is.
Friday arrives and I know Mistress has got another working hat on today so I wish her a very successful day and once again make a security camera-related mistake. I inform Mistress that it will be off this evening due to someone staying. Twice in one week, I have failed and Mistress’s reply left in no doubt of that. I apologised, rewrote and resent the message again. The outcome as I write this is awaited……
After a wait of several hours. I am pleased to announce that my much more subservient, begging for permission message was duly replied too. The short message that Mistress sent not only gave me permission but also left me feeling suitably put in my place. I thanked Mistress for her reply and although it wasn’t my intention to get it so wrong her message today left me in no doubt how much I love being her slave.
This has also reminded me how much I need and craves Mistress in my life but it needs to be on her terms, not mine!!