• Tag Archives Chastity Control
  • Slave Taquin – Chastity/Distance Control Week 16 Diary

    While I have been away, chastity Slave, Taquin has been suffering immeasurably with the situation he found himself in; locked and without his Mistress to guide him.  Mistress made sure, however, that in my absence, he slave would suffer on a daily basis even without my being there.  You see, my pets and those of you who read this hoping to one day join my collection of Chaste slaves, I make sure that I get inside in your head and find out what makes you tick and then I use that information in ways that twist your mind as you find yourself wrapped around my little finger with blue balls and a throbbing cock.  The longer our relationship develops, the deeper inside I go until you are helplessly and hopelessly horny under my control.  The following update from Slave Taquin tells of his time locked up away from Mistress, I may also publish his Journal at a later date.  For now enjoy the read and note the comment at the end of his write-up.  A comment that he will be punished for!

    Although titled ‘Week 16’ this blog is a short summary of the last 3 weeks. It started with me looking forward to a session that I had booked with Mistress, who was going to be joined on this occasion by Mistress Jessy. And how I was looking forward to it! Unfortunately it wasn’t to be. It soon became clear that Mistress would need to be away for a couple of weeks. My session was a casualty of this. I was really disappointed of course but the needs of my Mistress are certainly more important than mine. It did lead to a real dilemma however. And for once I did, initially at least, have some say in the outcome. The dilemma was whether or not I would remain in the chastity device in Mistress’s absence. I had by this time been locked in Chastity 24/7 for more than 2 weeks. It had not been an easy process. In particular I had experienced some problems with the device causing chafing. I was now getting used to the device and I thought it would be a shame not to continue. (I also thought to myself that it should be quite easy without Mistress being around to torment me – how wrong I was). In discussion with Mistress we therefore agreed that I should remain locked up throughout her absence.

    Having made the decision Mistress informed me that there was no going back on it. She instructed me to write a daily journal for her that was to include detailed descriptions of any fantasies that I had. It was at this point that my torment kicked off. I started to think about the fantasies that I was going to record for Mistress. There was one overwhelming thought that I had not yet confessed to her but that had been in my mind for the last 5 days. It came from a lighthearted exchange between Mistress and myself where I had joked about taking the device off and masturbating. She had responded ‘that I had better mind my tongue or the next time we met she would replace the plastic lock with a steel one’. Now if there is one thing that I hate it is the ability to free myself. I am sure that Mistress knows this and she had therefore ‘sown the seed’ in my mind about the possibility of being locked up in a way that would leave me totally and completely at her mercy. In my final text to Mistress before her time away I told her that I was ready to take this next step. 

    The thought of all opportunity to free myself being taken away from me sent me into something of a tailspin. In the immortal words of Sissy Mouse ‘I will be totally fucked’! I could think of nothing else for days. It is that contradiction that I am having to live with daily now. I think of Mistress being really tough with me and refusing to release me despite my desperation and pleading. It makes me so scared and yet so incredibly excited at the same time. The thing that scares and excites me most is the fact that I know she is capable of breaking  slaves much tougher than me. I guess it comes down to the trust that a sub puts in his dom. I have absolute trust in Miss Deelight.

    Writing my journal has been an interesting but incredibly tormenting experience. Interesting because it maps my progression from being ‘Strong Taquin’ (those who have been reading this blog previously will understand) in the first few days to being ‘Desperate Taquin’ by the end. This progression was partly driven by the increasing time since my last orgasm.

    A status summary might be useful at this point:
    The last time I had a proper orgasm (ie not a ruin) given by Mistress was 19 weeks ago.
    The last time I was allowed to provide myself an orgasm was 8 weeks ago.
    I was locked in Chastity 5 weeks ago.

    No wonder I am feeling so desperate today! I am aware that this amount of time is nothing compared to some of her Slaves but Mistress has now pushed me further than I would ever have thought possible. She has previously told me that she will decide when I can be pushed further than is comfortable for me. She is most certainly doing that.

    My desperation is also driven by the requirement to record and send Mistress my fantasies. In writing each fantasy I become more and more horny. To make matters worse I now read back over what I have written and worry that I have said too much. I have however promised not to re-write my journal as the days go by. If I were to do so it would not be the truthful account that I was instructed to provide.

    As the days have passed I have become more and more desperate. On a couple of occasions I have seriously considered taking off the device and giving myself the release that my body is screaming out for. However in doing so I have considered what the consequences might be. (I will always be honest with Mistress and would therefore have to tell her on her return.)
    1) Mistress will be disappointed and angry with me.
    2) I will be disappointed in myself.
    3) I would have no chance of receiving an orgasm from Mistress at my next session.
    4) I would probably be punished when we next met.
    5) My next period of Chastity might be increased by several weeks.
    6) Mistress might tell me that our agreement is over.
    Even when faced with the above possibilities I was still so close to removing it. I do enjoy being denied but only to a point. This point was crossed about half way through the period of Mistresses absence. Since then it has been so very difficult.

    I know that I wont be alone in having missed Mistress terribly. I had been in daily contact with her for almost 4 months before her absence and have come to really look forward to our communication. Whilst it is in some ways an unusual relationship it is a still a relationship. Mistress is the only person who I can talk with about this aspect of my life. The nature of the relationship also allows me to be more honest about other aspects of my life as well. Her absence has therefore created a void. To make matters worse the chastity device that I now wear to preserve her property reminds me of Mistress throughout every day, and for most of every night. I need to see her soon. Not just for the sexual relief that I desperately hope that she will provide me this time, but because I enjoy being with her. Goodness knows why when she is so cruel to me!

    Distance Control via SMS

    Chastity and Keyholding Online Service

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  • Slave Taquin – Chastity/Distance Control Week 13 Diary

    I have you by the balls Slave


    By the end of this week I will be half way through my distance control contract with Miss Deelight. As is the case with all good things, time is passing too quickly for my liking. If however the second half is as wonderful as the first, I will be a very lucky slave indeed.

    My first text of the week to Mistress confessed the fact that after two weeks of denial I was now getting somewhat desperate. Her response was to to send a series of texts that just played with my mind, and my cock. All I wanted to know was whether or not I was permitted to touch myself at bedtime that night. Mistress seemed to enjoy making me wait for an answer. Eventually I was given the OK to have a stroke before bed time. I consider myself to be very lucky if I am allowed to do this. My cock does now belong to Mistress and I consider such permission to be a gift from her. It is something of a ‘double edged sword’ however as once I have stroked it means that I am even hornier and desperate than before. This is both good and bad!

    The following day commenced with the bad news that Mistress was unwell. She had picked up some winter virus that would not go away. Whilst I continued to receive instructions from Mistress, that were followed as always, I found myself too concerned for her well being to feel the benefit of them. I like to think that it is a truth of human nature that we care for the well being of others. Therefore if Mistress is unwell I am concerned for her and inevitably the nature of our relationship is effected temporarily. I guess I know longer felt under her control. I stopped texting for instructions and got on with life again.

    On Friday night I could tell that Mistress had begun to improve. I was on a packed train on my way back from a nice meal with friends in London. It was the last train back and so I had been very relieved to jump aboard just before it left Paddington station. I settled in to one of the last remaining seats in cattle class. My fellow passengers either looked weary after a long week at the office or pleasantly refreshed after a night on the town. I was just drifting off to sleep when the first text came through from Mistress. She wanted to know where I was. I told her. She inquired why I had been to London. I told her. She reminded me of the fact that trains contained toilets. Oh dear! I was instructed to go to the toilet cubicle and edge myself straight away. When I receive a message like this to do something immediately it almost seems like Mistress is there with me. Therefore I made my way past standing passengers, and the guy who is inevitably sat on the floor outside the cubicle, locked myself in the cubicle, and did what I was told. Surprisingly it didn’t take long. I say surprisingly as I hate doing anything like this in a public environment. It is a real turn off for me. It worked for me in this instance as I had the instructions from Mistress fresh in my mind. I returned to my seat and reported my success to Mistress. She told me that it had seemed too quick, and that I was to wait 10 minutes and go and do it again. This time with photographic evidence! The discomfort of doing such a thing again played on my mind for the next 10 minutes. At the required time I went to the toilet cubicle at the other end of the carriage (therefore hoping that my fellow travelers would not notice another trip to the toilet – I don’t know why it concerns me but it does). As hard as I tried to edge myself nothing was happening. This was partly due to the people who kept trying the toilet door to see if it was really engaged. I  took a photo of a very limp cock, returned to my seat and sent it to Mistress. I was worried that Mistress might be angry at my failure, but fortunately she just seemed to find it very funny. Needless to say I never did get any sleep on my return home. Mistress was starting to re-impose herself on my life.

    The following day was pretty straightforward. I went fishing and therefore only exchanged texts with Mistress in the early evening. She asked how many fish I had caught. I said ‘2’. She said that that was crap and imposed an instant 4 day ban on touching myself!! I do get so horny when Mistress is tough and uncompromising. I became instantly hard.

    Following a restless nights sleep thinking about Mistress I sent my morning text. As part of this I asked when she will  allow me to meet with her again. I have been hoping for many weeks that the meeting will take place, but it has not been possible up until now. I am actually quite proud of the fact that I have not asked this question for a while now, but this morning I feel that I really need to be with her. Mistress responds that she is working it into her schedule. Thank goodness. But then she asks for ‘my availability over the next 2 weeks’. 2 weeks! I text her and suggest that she is teasing me. Her response puts me firmly back into my ‘sub’ space. Although she understands that I have been a good boy by being so patient I am to suffer with the fact that the meeting might not happen for a fortnight. Mistress informs me that she is enjoying torturing me. If I felt that I had regained any power in our relationship earlier in the week, it has well and truly been taken away from me now. I am totally helpless again and Mistress is driving me absolutely nuts!

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  • Slave Taquin – Chastity/Distance Control Week 9 Diary

    Poor Slave Taquin had his heart ripped out this week in what was a very skilfully delivered act of genius on my part; a true forced orgasm.  Someone on twitter asked me how any orgasm could possibly be bad; you’re about to find out…..

    I started the week with something of an epiphany! Up until the point when Mistress took control of my orgasms I had thought that my degree of hornyness and general desperation to cum was largely driven by the length of time that I had been without release. Indeed when I commenced this distance control contract with her I had gone as far as to believe that, it was likely that the more often that she took me through the cycle of tease, denial and suffering followed eventually by the opportunity to cum, I would in some way become accustomed to it. The belief being therefore that I would need to be denied for longer each time for it to have the same effect. This has proved in practice to be total bollocks! The reality has been that Mistress has managed to get me in a total mess earlier and earlier in each cycle. I am writing this on day 4 of my current period of denial by Mistress. All it took today was for Mistress to send me one brief text enjoying my predicament and teasing me about the future, and as a result I feel quite desperate. I am not even sure what I am desperate for? I know that an orgasm would feel fantastic at the moment and it would certainly relieve the pressure building up in my balls, but at the same time I yearn to be put into the chastity device that Mistress has for me in order that she can torment me to new levels of desperation. So what is the promised epiphany? It is simply this. The better that Mistress gets to know me, the easier it is for her to drive me nuts, and the sooner it is in each cycle that the red mist of desperation descends. I am contracted to Mistress for a further 4 and a half months. I hate to think what she will be able to do to me by then.

    As each day went by I was either instructed to stroke, edge or abstain from touching altogether. Mistress would also tease me in her daily texts with what it would feel like to be in Chastity and with the promise that it was going to happen very soon. The days went by and Mistress filled my thoughts. I felt increasingly excited but also scared. The fear in this situation is a positive reminder of the situation I find myself in. It is driven by the genuine discomfort in the fact that all of the power in this relationship sits with Mistress. I have never been in such a relationship before whether that be personal or work related. Even at work I had some ‘power’ over my boss. With Mistress I have to accept being totally powerless. I knew that being put into a chastity device would make this absolute.

    Finally the day arrived. I sent my morning text to Mistress confirming that I was looking forward to our session and she replied confirming details. The die was cast. I really was going to go through with it. The day was spent in much the same way as those previously, trying to get on with earning a living whilst sneaking the occasional look at a picture, text or Vine clip of Mistress and dreaming of what was to come. As the day progressed my excitement and trepidation grew. At this point I should mention a daily occurrence that I have to deal with. Each day I battle with myself not to trouble Mistress with unnecessary texts. Sometimes I manage to go a whole day with only texting first thing in the morning and sometimes I just have to give in, either to tell her how I feel or with the need to hear from her just one more time. Well as the day of my session progressed I found that I had to send just one more text before getting ready to depart for our session. It was a short text telling Mistress that I felt that the clock that I had been watching all day was turning much more slowly than normal. I sent the text and awaited a response. Several minutes later my phone ‘dinged’ to tell me that Mistress had responded. I picked it up and eagerly went to the messages to see what she had said. I stood shocked and horrified as I read….

    ‘I have changed my mind Slave. I have decided that I don’t want to lock you up today. Instead I want you to go to the bathroom and masturbate and orgasm at the time that we were meant to be meeting. That is all’.

    With my mind in turmoil I read and re-read the text from Mistress. I know that any instruction from Mistress is normally final. But was I being tested or teased today? I sent a text telling Mistress how much I wanted to see her today and how I really, really was ready to be locked in a chastity device. She sent me a You Tube clip of a bleating lamb! I told her that I had enjoyed the clip but hoped that our session would progress as previously planned. She told me to refer to the earlier text that told me that it wasn’t going to happen. This exchange continued briefly. My pleading was to no avail. Mistress was absolutely serious. The session was off. So dear reader, how did I feel at this point? In truth many of my emotions could be compared to a 10 year old having a long awaited trip to the theme park cancelled at the last-minute! I was devastated, very upset, and in some ways angry (I had after all told a work colleague that I did not need him to work with me that day and provided myself with a cover story for my absence for those that needed to be told). I did also consider the possibility that something had happened to Mistress during the day and that the session cancellation was a ‘cover’ for her misfortune. As the afternoon progressed and the time for my masturbation neared my disappointment grew. I had believed that this day was the one where Mistress was going to make my denial complete with the application of the device. Instead I was not going to be with her and worse still I was to release the tension in my balls by having an orgasm!

    I am ultimately a well-behaved Slave. I have agreed that I will do whatever I am told. Therefore when the time of our cancelled session arrived I went to the bathroom to masturbate as instructed. After several minutes of trying it became obvious that all attempts to cum were proving futile. My mind was totally enveloped in the disappointment of the day. I stopped trying further and sent Mistress a text telling her of my failure. Within my text I did ask why she was doing this to me today. Was she OK? Was I being punished? Or was she just being terribly mischievous? The response received was stern and unequivocal. She was not pleased that I had failed the task and was to go a complete it, and NOW. I returned to the bathroom with Mistresses displeasure fresh in my mind and wanked. It was not easy, it was not particularly pleasurable but eventually I had the required orgasm. I sent Mistress my text informing her that I had completed the task. She asked how I felt and I replied honestly that I felt deflated and disappointed. Her response was clear. In summary it said that she had wanted to make me endure a forced orgasm (where every part of my mind and body did not want to cum, but where I had to anyway). She informed me that she knows how to control my cock. How to make it tick and how to make it, and me, suffer. She would at all times decide what was best for me. Pleading and begging just prolongs my suffering. I am helpless.

    As I woke the following morning I was reminded of the epiphany referred to at the beginning of this blog. Despite all that had happened the day before I had woken early, hard and horny. I did not realise in the moment that I sent my morning text to Mistress that I would, by the end of the day, be so desperate once again. The task that I was set for the day was new to me. I was to tie my cock and balls for the whole day but it was to be on the basis that they would be tied for one hour and released for one hour. Each time I released myself I was to stroke my cock for 1 minute. (I was soon to realise that each time I released myself I would instantly become hard and that a minute of stroking would be sufficient to take me close to the edge). This meant therefore that there were 7 times that I tied my cock and balls, 7 times that I released myself and 7 times that I stroked myself for one minute. 21 occasions to be forced to remember yesterday, 21 occasions to be taken close to the edge, 21 occasions be reminded of the total control that Mistress now has over me. 

    The roller coaster of emotion that Mistress is taking me on continues and I have no idea of what twist or turn awaits me. Whatever happens I know that my cock (and therefore much of my being) is being controlled by a wonderful, but totally uncompromising Mistress. As she has become tougher with me I have had to accept my true position in this relationship. This is the first genuine Dom / Sub relationship that I have experienced and it is one that I am learning to accept and embrace. I have sent my morning text and await my instructions.

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  • Slave Taquin – Chastity/Distance Control Week 8 Diary

    It was only a week and a half since my last proper orgasm. I say ‘proper’ as Mistress has been enjoying teasing me with card games recently. To start with a win was a win and I got to cum. More recently though a win has either been a timed wank challenge that inevitably I lose (it seems that I am unable to make myself cum when the clock is ticking down) or NOT having to endure a ruin. Therefore winning is now no fun and losing is far worse!

    In reality it is no time at all to have been denied. This is what I keep telling myself, but for some reason I have found the early days of this week to be quite difficult. Since my session with Mistress I now have a better understanding of what I have signed up for and it continues to thrill me. Indeed I think that Mistress has, at times, allowed my own imagination to flourish whilst only needing to embellish and guide where necessary. There was one task set by Mistress at the beginning of the week that totally dominated my thinking thereafter. I was to research & select a Chastity device and send my recommendation to Mistress for approval.

    Those of you who have followed this Blog from the beginning will know that the wearing of a Chastity device was not part of my plan! And yet by Tuesday  I found that I could think of nothing else. My mind was totally filled with the vision of Mistress locking it in place. It is an amazing contradiction that I still don’t understand. I am desperate to cum because I am being teased and denied and yet my ‘solution’ is to ask Mistress to make me suffer still further. I can only compare it to the wonderful moment when stripped naked at the HOD I put my hands behind my back and feel Mistress pull the rope tight around my wrists and tie the knot. I have allowed myself to be put in this predicament, but as the knot tightens, I know that I am totally helpless, and it feels so good! By Tuesday afternoon I had sent the text almost begging Mistress to lock me in a Chastity device. We agreed the specification and Mistress placed the order.

    The following morning I sent Mistress my morning text requesting my days instructions as normal. The response came as a surprise. Firstly because Mistress informed me that the device had arrived (the wonders of Internet shopping I guess) and secondly that Mistress was giving me permission to cum that day. The permission was on the basis that I should make the absolute most of it because ‘things were about to get serious’! The combination of the pent up desire built up over the previous days combined with the anticipation and spine tingling fear of what was to come provided the backdrop to one of the best self delivered orgasms of all time.

    The next morning was New Years day and Mistress commenced her next campaign of torments. I was sent a picture of the device, told to tie up my cock and balls, and instructed to imagine what it was going to feel like to be locked up. Apparently this was ‘day one of my torturous denial’. It was being made pretty clear to me from this and other communications received that Mistress was about to make me suffer like never before. In the past it has taken me a few days to build up again following an orgasm. Not any more, day one and already I feeling really horny.

    And so here I am at 5am on Sunday morning completing my blog for Mistress as instructed. Why 5am? Well yesterday Mistress turned up the heat. Those of you who follow Mistress on Twitter will have seen that she decided to taunt me with a vine video of my chastity device. What you wont have seen are the texts received to back this up. In particular the wonderful picture of Mistress together with the instructions that I must not even stroke myself anymore, and that she is going to enjoy every second of my suffering! I awoke this morning at around 4am with a hard on that I was not allowed to enjoy in any way. This really is most frustrating. Once I have completed this blog I will send my morning text to Mistress asking for my daily instructions. Mistress has told me that she will only give me 24hrs notice of when she is going to lock me in the device. In doing so she has ensured that I spend all day every day waiting for that fateful text to arrive. As I write this I really do question my own judgment in taking this next step. I am feeling so horny today and yet I haven’t even been locked up yet. I really don’t know what to expect once I am, but fear that I might be made to regret the day that I pleaded with Mistress to make it happen.


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  • Slave Taquin – Chastity/Distance Control Week 3 Diary

    Having been allowed 2 orgasms at the end of last week I had thought that this week would be easy. As I no longer possess the vigor of youth that I once enjoyed it can take a little longer for the batteries to re charge these days – or so I thought! Mistress had other ideas it seems. Firstly Mistress told me that I should have a new name. I now find myself known as Taquin and in doing so feel even more under her control. On Monday there were two wonderful Twitter postings. One with Mistress showing her stockings and the other with her ready to use her gag. Most exciting! I am not allowed to touch myself for pleasure unless Mistress has specifically sanctioned it. I am not sure how much I did this in the past but now, knowing that it is off-limits until told otherwise, it is exciting and frustrating. I managed to put up with this until Monday when I felt the need at least to give myself a little stimulation. I was allowed 2 minutes at bed time which was lovely but led to the inevitable desire for more. Following a sleepless night on Monday Mistress posted a wonderful picture of herself with her bondage rope. This was enough to turn me into a blithering idiot and to text Mistress for permission to cum. Of course this was swiftly denied and all I was allowed was to pleasure myself for a little longer that evening. And the week has progressed from there. Mistress seems to be allowing me to become more excited as the week goes on. My desire to cum increases likewise and I am powerless to do anything about it. I go to sleep with a hard on and wake up in a similar state. On one particular day I had requested permission to cum which was denied but worse still Mistress told me that I was not to touch myself at all for pleasure. I now have even greater respect for those gentlemen wearing a chastity device! Whilst for me this only lasted for 2 days I did find that not being able to touch yourself is very tormenting indeed. It was at this point that I shared with Mistress the fact that I was suffering much confusion. I found myself wanting to touch myself but at the same time desperately hoping that my period of chastity and denial would last for ages. Mistress has responded that she knows what is best for me and not to worry! I find this both ominous and exciting. I am very happy to trust her judgement and to just let it happen. Whatever that brings. Permission to touch myself was again granted at the end of the week (backed up by strict instructions not to cum). I have no idea what next week will bring but only know that I am loving be under the control of Miss Deelight.

    Dominatrix with Ball Gag

    Dominatrix with Rope

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